Today I had a huge craving for steak, so I took some time out and went to a steak place for some dinner instead of the hawker stalls downstairs from my apartment. While at dinner, I had the chance to listen in on the conversation of a group of people beside me... now, I'm not naturally a busybody, but they spoke so loudly, I could not help but overhear what they had to say.
I'm not too sure about the identities of the people in this group, but I got the impression that the future son-in-law was taking his girlfriend and her parents out for a dinner. Although I am a pretty judgemental person, these days I usually allow people a chance to show me that they are okay... however, I took an instant dislike these people, I guess it had something to do with their tone of voice and they way they talked.
Firstly, I felt a little sorry for the gal because it seemed like the man she was gonna get married to has quite an aggressive personality, a huge sense of ego, he is also pretty judgemental (like me.... haiz).... except that he has a complete lack of decorum and diplomacy. I have honestly never seen any prospective groom-to-be act in such rude manner to his prospective parents-in-law. However, as the evening wore on, it became quite apparent to me that the mother-in-law and daughter weren't exactly great people either. For one thing, their famliy seemed to have a substantial number of relatives who somehow have a considerable gambling addiction and they always seem to be lending these gamblers substantial sums of money.
Now, here's the really really funny part. The prospective groom mentioned at one point that the notion of money and of losing control of his money really really gets him riled up. In fact, he doesn't seem to like his own relatives spending their own money friviously. It is therefore pretty strange that he is getting married to this gal :P I guess, it is prehaps an opportunity that I have been given to witness that quite literally everyone on this planet is surrounded by people who reflect his lessons back at himself.
It's also a reflection for me. I am certainly one who is extremely riled up by the notion of money. However, over time, I have learned to control my own outbursts regarding the spending of cash. Also, I am learning the difference between having abundance (having all that you need to survive) and accumulating wealth (just having lots and lots of money).
I guess what I learnt from these people is that... one can have a lot of money, but might not necessarily enjoy having all that money. Certainly, I think the prospective parents-in-law might be tolerating the young man in part because he might have a lot of money. He did mention at one point that his relatives are rich enough to own their own private boat.
Anyways, seeing them kinda reminds me of someone I knew well in a previous lifetime. I got to know the person in question when I was incarnate as an Englishman in the period of the World Wars. Yes, I do actually remember with some detail, the lifetimes I have led, although I might not often speak to friends directly about them.
As I was saying, I knew this fella in my previous lifetime. I was working in government in the time of the Second World War. He was a pretty interesting fellow. I guess a wee bit indulgent and not always the best disciplined of men, but he never lacked courage and tenacity although he could be easily discouraged and go into bouts of depression so deep he often referred to these bouts as his "black dog".
I suppose he was a great mirror to me about my own issues... especially the issue of abundance. I have always felt that of all men, he was one who would never have issues regarding money. In his lifetime, I watched him rise to the apex of worldwide fame, so that almost every person in the civilized world knew who he was. You could say today, he is more famous than Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt. And certainly, more respected than .... Nelson Mandela for instance...
And yet, he was always dogged by issues of money... especially having "no money"... At first, I could not understand why he was always taking up so many projects... working tirelessly ... it was like he was always fearful that he would not have enough for his old age or his family... I would have thought that with his level of fame, he would have no problem getting money through books or talks or even appearance fees...
And yet.... alas.... despite having the whole world at his feet, this most respected of men never felt secure... never truly enjoyed the fruits of his labour... Well, I'm one to talk... after all, I was... am still... more or less in the same boat as him...
In stark contrast, I recently met a young man who...by his own admission never has more than $2000 in his bank account and YET, is able to travel around the world and do whatever the heck he wants. He was recently in London and apparently living it up... going to the West End every evening... enjoying the sights... all that... and never having S$2000 in his account.
How is that possible?
I suppose it is tied in to skills in money management... I notice that he never overspends what he has and lives within means... taking delight with whatever he has... and never fearing what comes tomorrow. I suppose it is also helped by the fact that his family are devoted worshippers at a local Chinese temple and that they are not only practitioners at the temple but also its patrons... (they are ordinary working people)... I guess their faith in their gods sustains them and in the end, provides for them. I suppose that is ONE WAY of getting through life without fear or worry of tomorrow.
However, in such manner, I have no gods in which I might lean on... As I understand it, the creator I believe in neither requires nor desires my worship and certainly isn't about to spoon-feed me on my path through life.
The idea of having a god that looks after everything for me for the price of my worship and devotion certainly is tempting, but I know that that is not my path and certainly I think my own creator would be disappointed if I were to treat him as do others treat their gods. Turning to the divine with a multitude of platitudes and requests and offerings... using the divine like a device... but without truly having a desire to understand the personality of that divinity.
Well, I guess I better stop there before I start sounding judgemental, after all, it is in the paths of some others to worship, offer sacrifices and devotion to a god.
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