Considering What's Being Promoted Out There... I Actually Sound Sane :P

 
Sometimes, when writing in this blog, I wonder if the occasional visitor might think that I'm a tad loony. I mean after all, this is my one place to express my uncensored views about spirituality, magic, karma and other stuff.... And I unashamedly declare that I believe in the existance of magic, spirits and aliens...

However, after receiving the following facebook message from a well-meaning individual who attended the Love and Light Festival this past Saturday at Suntec, I am starting to feel that at the very least, I sound a whole lot saner than whoever it was who came up with the following. Incidently, from a friend who visited the event, the following information was printed in brochures that was then distributed freely. 

I really really wonder if any mainstream, non-new age person reading it might just think every new ager is a bit "insane".

However, before I give my own commentry... I'll let you read it:

(The following information DOES NOT originate from me, nor do I support what is being stated in the following passages.)

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New Agers in general believe that Mother Earth was a 3rd density Consciousness or Being until several decades ago when It began Its journey of ascending to the 4th density consciousness. It is partly because of this transition that there is an increased level of earth changes in recent years and in the years to come.

As part of Mother Earth's Ascension humans have, broadly speaking, three evolutionary choices:

1. Humans can choose to remain in the 3rd density consciousness, in which case they will not be able to withstand Earth's rising vibrations and must therefore pass on and reincarnate on another 3rd density planet to continue their journey of evolution.

2. The second option is for them to raise their consciousness to the 4th density along with Mother Earth, and together they will create Heaven on Earth and usher in the New Golden Age. Some may however choose to pass on and reincarnate on Mother Earth as 4th density newborns.

3. The third option is for them to raise their consciousness to the 5th density, in which case they can continue to live on Earth but with their crystalline light body they will have the ability to travel or even migrate to other planets and dimensions.

Ascension is usually a gradual evolutionary process that takes many millennia and lifetimes but it is believed that in current times it can happen within the next few decades. This is because of several celestial and cosmic events, such as:

a. The Galactic Shift, a phenomenon where our solar system passes through the Photon Belt region (a band of non-polarized electromagnetic energy) of the Milky Way galaxy. This passage occurs only once every 108 million years and lasts 150-200 years, and is believed to have begun sometime between 1900 to 1950. This shift has the most powerful influence of all these cosmic events.

b. The 2012 Precessional Alignment, a phenomenon where Earth's axis is tilted to an angle that aligns with a constellation of highly-charged stars (or quasars) in the centre of the galaxy that emit very high frequencies. This alignment occurs once every 26,000 years and will last for 3 days, presumably from 20th to 22nd Dec 2012.

c. The large number of highly-evolved Old Souls and New Children presently incarnated and still incarnating on earth. The earlier ones are the Violet, Violet-Indigo and Indigo children (who are adults by now), and the later ones are the Crystal, Dragon and Rainbow children.

d. The assistance from highly-evolved beings and ET civilizations.

The above events have the effect of accelerating Mother Earth's and Humanity’s ascension process, mainly through the non-polarized or high frequencies that they bring to the earth plane. These frequencies are the main cause of many people recently 'waking up', looking for deeper meaning to life rather than just plodding along.

It is currently estimated that the majority of humans will choose to remain in the 3rd density consciousness, while most of the rest will choose to ascend to the 4th density consciousness and only a very small minority will ascend to the 5th density consciousness. These are choices made on the soul level which may or may not be conscious to us and they are made based chiefly on one’s spiritual readiness to ascend.

Whether or not one is a believer in Ascension, spirituality today remains very much the same as it has always been. And it is to Be thyself, Accept thyself, Love thyself, Heal thyself, Express thyself and Realize that All is but Thyself. Then there is nothing to fear but everything to love, enjoy and appreciate. Ascension is just a by-product.

We hope this information helps rather than frightens. Ultimately, 5th density is not better than 4th density, which in turn is not better than 3rd density. They are just different paths of evolution and whichever path that the soul chooses, it has been done so for the highest good of all and with the good counsel of the Infinite Creator.

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I'd like to state for the record that the abovementioned views are NOT something that the general new age community believes in. I am in this community and I DO NOT subscribe to those views. Neither do dozens of other people, some of whom are owners of new age shops and establishments. Just because the Fluffy Bunny-Love and Light segment of our community yaps louder, doesn't mean that that's the view we all hold to.


I came across similar information some years back, and I'm ashamed to say that at one point, I did subscribe to the idea of "ascension" and some of the loony stuff that the above passage alludes to. I'm glad however that my own skeptical nature won out in the end and I decided quite some time ago that a lot of the stuff that you have just read is total BS.

The problem with the New Age scene is that I don't see many people asking the simple questions : "How do you know that what you believe is true?", "Who was the originator of this idea?" and "Where did the originator of the idea get his idea from?"

I mean, no one I have met has asked if the following is actually true:

"Mother Earth was a 3rd density Consciousness or Being until several decades ago when It began Its journey of ascending to the 4th density consciousness."

I mean, how the bleeping blazes do we know if the whole 3rd, 4th and 5th density system is true? And if I'm reading the abovementioned passage right, lots and lots of humans are going to die in the coming "ascension of earth". Naturally, the new ager promoting the idea probably doesn't think he/she is going to be one of the ones...

"...not be able to withstand Earth's rising vibrations and must therefore pass on and reincarnate on another 3rd density planet to continue their journey of evolution."


And here's another thing I'm having trouble with...

"The large number of highly-evolved Old Souls and New Children presently incarnated and still incarnating on earth. The earlier ones are the Violet, Violet-Indigo and Indigo children (who are adults by now), and the later ones are the Crystal, Dragon and Rainbow children...."

Firstly, ARE there even such things as "Indigo" children??? 

Some years back, I posed this question to F... who I'm glad to say... plaused for a long moment and then said... "I don't know." 

Then I suggested the following... 

"Well, since you have a method of accessing your own inner knowing... and since most of the people we know are trained in some form of divination... why not let's just ask... find out for ourselves... ARE THERE SUCH THINGS AS INDIGO CHILDREN???"

And wouldn't you believe it... the answers we got from our own divinations were a resounding "NO!" Well, that would also cast doubt on the existance of "crystal", "dragon" and "rainbow" children. 

(Seriously folks, especially for those of you who dabble in divination... for cripes sake, what the heck is your skill in this area for, if not to help you answer some serious questions? If you trust it enough to use it in your daily decision making, why not also use it to ask if something is real? Unless of course, you don't really trust your own skills in this area.)



Now, some of you might argue that there is an increasing amount of kids who are born with ADD or ADHD (attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder )or diagnosed as being with such issues ... a characteristic often associated with "Indigo Children"...


But if you honestly think about it, the increasing number of cases could ALSO be due to the effects of the modern lifestyle on children. Despite the increasing focus on nutrition, the reality is that lots of kids aren't really eating healthily. The modern diet brings kids in contact with unhealthy things like snackfoods and sugary sweets at higher frequency than at any other time in history. This brings to mind something I saw in "Supersize Me"... A school for delinquents actually solved problems of delinquent behaviour and lack of attention in class by cutting out all sugar from their school menu. Only water is dispensed by the vending machines and canteen food consists of fresh, organic produce that is low in red meat and high in veggies.

If YOUR kid is diagnosed ADD or ADHD, could the problem really be his/her DIET/LIFESTYLE??? I mean, really... is there a need to give your child a fancy label just because you don't want to recognise a problem that might be there?

So where did the whole notion of "Indigo Children" come from? Well, as far as is actually documented, the term was coined by Nancy Ann Tappe, a psychic who wrote "Understanding Your Life Through Colour" (1982). Here's a quote from Tappe herself:

"The Indigo phenomenon has been recognized as one of the most exciting changes in human nature ever documented in society. The Indigo label describes the energy pattern of human behavior which exists in over 95% of the children born in the last 10 years … This phenomena is happening globally and eventually the Indigos will replace all other colors. As small children, Indigo’s are easy to recognize by their unusually large, clear eyes. Extremely bright, precocious children with an amazing memory and a strong desire to live instinctively, these children of the next millennium are sensitive, gifted souls with an evolved consciousness who have come here to help change the vibrations of our lives and create one land, one globe and one species. They are our bridge to the future...."

Of course, the "indigo children" idea is today often credited to Edgar Cayce aka The Sleeping Prophet through the book "Psychic Children: A Sign of Our Expanding Awareness" by authors Peggy Day and Susan Gale. Problem is, I'm having a freakishly hard time trying to find an actual quotation from Cayce mentioning the term "Indigo Children". Apparently according to some sources, he did mention the birth of some rather unusual individuals at the end of the twentieth century and for some years after that... but I don't think he said anything about anyone being "indigo". 

Now that we're actually asking questions and finding out about where ideas come from... you might want to ask if "Mother Earth" is actually "ascending". That might also lead you to ask more probing questions about what this whole notion of "ascension" is about.

I actually asked that question a long time ago... "What on earth is this Ascension thing anyway?" I never really got a clear answer from anyone ... really....

Now, traditionally "ascension" referred to directly entry into heaven/nirvana/the hereafter... without actually dying... In some religions, the said ascended person is taken up into heaven. In other religions, the body (sometimes laid out for a wake after an apparently physical death) of the ascended person is said to mysteriously vanish, vapourise or disappear. 

For about a year or so, I kinda believed that truly, the end of our spiritual path on earth might indeed result in ascension... hey, everyone would like to "transcend" over to the hereafter without actually dying... and I'm no big exception.

Naturally I did my reading about this whole "ascension" business. After all, if you really believe you are going to ascend, why not find out as much as possible? 

Over time, I lost my belief in "ascending" because, I came into contact with other new age ideas surrounding this concept. The one idea I really really dislike to this very day, is the notion that some ascended beings "ascended masters", who are allegedly loving, kind and have the welfare of humanity at heart, are passing half-assed messages of "love and light" to "channellers" who are then making tons of moolah off people who do not ask the relevent questions. 

I recently gained much more enlightenment after reading a physics article than I have reading any "channelled" message by any number of "ascended masters".

Also it doesn't help that the originator of many of the modern ideas about ascended masters is Helena Petrovna Blavatsky, the founder of Theosophy, an individual whom I have felt for many years to be an untrustworthy drama queen, and who has been suspected of authoring quite a lot of the information she was allegedly "channelling" from her "mahatmas". :P

It also doesn't help that... after deciding to give modern Theosophists a chance and attending an introductory meeting at their Singapore HQ, that I left feeling I had attended a gathering of pretty narrow-minded and frankly downright hateful individuals who do not do proper research on what they are saying. In fact, I'd add that the Singapore government might want to look in on this organisation because the speaker was openly making comments that in any other normal religious organisation in this country, might be construed as insulting/slandering towards other mainstream beliefs. I was pretty shocked that in religion/race-sensitive Singapore, such comments could be made at a meeting which members of the public were invited to attend.

The modern ideas about ascension and ascended masters were somewhat developed by in individual named Guy Ballard and his wife Edna. He later founded the "I AM" movement / activity, which today remains popular... (albeit under a slightly different name)... despite the fact that the couple were convicted of fraud in 1942... (the judgement was later made void by the court .... its a long story and something you might want to google later. You can also google up any one of a number of very disparaging websites which explain in detail and pan the teachings of "I AM" and call Guy Ballard and his wife frauds. I remember reading "The I AM Activity... Exposed" many years ago, it was quite an interesting article, and even has a USD 10 000 challenge :D)

The thing is, Guy Ballard promoted the notion that it was somehow possible for a person to raise his/her body into a kind of ascended ... perhaps deathless state.... 

Well, Guy himself never ever attained that state, nor his wife for that matter....:P They both died like normal people.

After reading about ascension and stuff, I realised that there is NO PROOF that anyone has ever achieved option number 3 in the article that was published at this year's Love and Light Festival...

"The third option is for them to raise their consciousness to the 5th density, in which case they can continue to live on Earth but with their crystalline light body they will have the ability to travel or even migrate to other planets and dimensions."

 
I would personally like to be able to travel to other planets and see the universe, but I think I have more chance of doing it via Richard Branson's Virgin Galactic idea, than I have with any notion of "ascension".

And if you are thinking that the "crystaline body" is some kind of "highly evolved" form, well, let me say that scientifically speaking... only Radiolarians (a kind of amoeboid protozoa) have been found to have developed skeletons made of crystal (eg. silica or even celestite)

Sooooo what... you wanna devolve into amoeba????? Is THAT "ascension"?

Now, after reading all of this, some of you folks out there might feel that I'm a pretty nasty individual of "low/dense vibration" with lots of "negativity" and that ... like tons of new agers in my country, think that its because I practice "black magic"....

Seriously, the very term and definition "Age of Aquarius" and quite a number of new age ideas, come from the biggest and allegedly "baddest" black magician of them all.... that's right.... ol' Uncle Al' (as some of his fanboys like to call him) or better known as Aleister Crowley, the great beast 666. Oh yeah, and his teachings came through channellings of his Holy Guardian Angel, Aiwass... (who allegedly contacted him when he was touring the Great Pyramid ).

Shocked yet?

Perhaps it's time to ask more questions and read the stuff that you don't wanna. Personally, I feel that the search for TRUTH should be more important than insubstantial notions of "Love and Light".

CNY.... Bleegh... and other odd things.....

With Chinese New Year coming up and work piling on my desk, the last few weeks, I've been trying to get as much done as possible so that I won't end up being out of breath and stressed up when my workplace datelines get nearer. Sometimes I wonder if I'm the one who is giving myself all that stress :P

I'm kinda glad that I resisted eating most of the Chinese New Year stuff... not only is it not good for me, but also when I see some of my colleagues falling sick, it really isn't funny :P Apparently there's a surge in patient numbers who are falling sick due to eating too much new year goodies and partying too hard over the long weekend.

CNY was okay for me for the most part, except for new year's eve, which is the one day of the year where I get to see the detested relatives from my mother's side :( Actually, I really really dislike a particular maternal uncle who is loud, attention seeking and says stuff that makes no darned sense. Everyone's stopped correcting him years ago, he never listens anyway. I don't mind guys who tell tall tales, but at least they have to be somewhat entertaining... and not incredibly dull and very very badly narrated with lots of stops, pauses and hemming and hawing to see if we are in awe of him or not...:P

And if he thinks I'll ever forget the way he treated my family when he was in trouble some years ago... and how he tried to force us to help him get out of it by showing up at our house shouting at the top of his voice... well... I'm not a very forgiving person... 

Some odd things happened over the long weekend.... for one, I was shocked by my sister's questions about the possibility of there being "half-breed" angels... (ie. half man-half angel)

This happened on Monday when we went out to meet Wolfy after a dinner with my paternal relatives (which I really much prefer actually). My sister wanted to tag along cos I guess she was bored. Over coffee, sometime after 1am, our conversations kinda swerved to the topic of angels...

Now, my sister has NO IDEA at all that I'm on a non-Christian spiritual path... Like the rest of my family, she follows the same brand of fundementalist belief.... however, I KNOW she isn't a "straight arrow" so to speak... otherwise she won't keep visiting facade.com for tarot readings....:P


Soooo... about half-angels.... 


See, the whole thing arose because of a passage in Genesis that my sister and myself have known about since we were teens.....

"Genesis 6:1-4 (NIV version)
When men began to increase in number on the earth and daughters were born to them,
2 the sons of God saw that the daughters of men were beautiful, and they married any of them they chose.
3 Then the Lord said, “My Spirit will not contend with man forever, for he is mortal; his days will be a hundred and twenty years.”
4 The Nephilim were on the earth in those days—and also afterward—when the sons of God went to the daughters of men and had children by them. They were the heroes of old, men of renown."

The phrase "The Nephilim" is not seen in the KJV (King James) version of the bible. It was translated from the original hebrew into the following....

"Genesis 6:4 (KJV Version)
There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare children to them, the same became mighty men which were of old, men of renown."

Now, some scholars theorise that Sons of God could refer to ...
1) fallen angels
2) powerful human rulers
3) godly descendants of Seth intermarrying with wicked descendants of Cain

The problem with 2) and 3) is that, well... ordinary humans + ordinary humans = more humans and not "giants" as indicated in verse 4. So many people tend to view 1) as the most likely possiblity.

Well, when I was much younger and still in the religion, I did ask certain pastors if "sons of God" could refer to 4) "aliens" but they pooh-poohed the idea. Aliens apparently don't exist in my family's fundementalist world view. I also asked about possiblity 5) "proper angels" well... needless to say they were shocked..... most people in the religion tend to think of angels as spirit beings without gender. Also, its stated in the gospels that angels don't marry... as evidenced by the following...

"Matt 22:30 (NIV Version)
At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven."

However, as some wily minds... (my sis included)... conclude... it doesn't say that angels don't make out. And angels have been known to take the form of human men.


I was a little bit surprised by my sis actually. I wonder what might be nibbling at her brains... because she was so insistant for me to answer her questions about this particular bible passage. I wondered why she didn't ask a proper minister instead. In fact, she pressed me for an answer if it might AT ALL be possible for there to be a half-angel to the point of asking if there is anything in the scriptures forbidding angels to mate with humans.

In my limited knowledge of theology.... the answer is "No". I have never come across any passage that indicated that proper angels are forbidden to mate with humans.

After that, she asked me what kind of superhuman powers a half-angel might have that might indicate their status. I don't think she was too happy when I told her that the only indication is size... the word "Nephilim" is roughly translated into "giant"... presumbly in terms of stature... but some scholars have suggested it might also refer to mental might.

I really really hope my sister doesn't end up being attracted to Doreen Virtue and the irk...:P Seriously speaking... I think that she's looking for some kind of power, but the angel folk are where most of the "fluffy bunnies" are. :P I don't think they could really teach her anything useful... and that whole "love and light" thing might cause her to puke.

Sad thing is, my sis doesn't see herself as an individual that might desire power. Truth be told... most humans are.... but like to think that they are "above all of that". She even once said to me that she probably has "few personal demons"....:P Honestly, despite being a pretty intuitive individual for most of her life.... I think this time, she's taking herself for a ride. :(

Now there's nothing wrong with wanting power, but I feel that there should be an acknowledgement by the individual that that is what they secretly desire. If not, things can get pretty skewed... and you get some pretty self-righteous notions coming out a deluded mind.

Mr Kitty Ran Away!

I put up postings in the online classifieds for a potential owner for Mr Kitty, but on the day that some German lady wanted to pick him up from the house, I found out that he was gone! In fact, he was gone for like....2 days by the time I got there... at least that was what I was told by a nearby neighbour who drops by the house pretty often...

Needless to say I wasn't the only one disappointed by his disappearance. I had to call off my meeting with the German lady at the last minute and she called back again like 15 mins later to ask if I managed to find him. I sort of got the impression that maybe she had gotten everything ready for a new cat. :(

I looked everywhere but he was definitely gone. At this point, I remember F telling me that she felt Mr Kitty was only there because I was there and it was probably the universe giving me an opportunity to adopt a cat. :(

I originally thought that was a little bit of an assumption on her part... but now I'm thinking there might be some truth to this whole cat thing. Well... I do miss Mr Kitty and IF he does wander back to the house again now that the not-so-friendly lady F had temporarily rented her house to for 3 weeks is gone, it will make me wonder if he really is meant to be my cat.

Cat for Adoption

An all black kitten wandered into F's home recently and has been staying there for the last few days. F doesn't know how it managed to get into the apparently closed back garden, but she thinks it probably crawled under the locked gate. She can't keep it because she travels constantly and is terribly allergic to cats :(


Mr Kitty (we actually do not know it's gender, but F thinks it is male) is very very cute and now we are trying our best to help it find a home. Potential owners can either leave a message in my chatbox to the right OR a comment under this post with contact details and I'll reply.

I really like this cat but sadly, my entire family hates them. So adoption by me is out of the question. :( 

Holiday That Was Not...

 

It's almost the end of the new year period and that means that I'll be back in my job next week :P I had anticipated spending some time during the Christmas-New Year season getting some rest and getting some stuff of mine straightened out.

That never happened.

The holidays this year was ....  very busy... I ended up meeting hordes of people I did not want to meet......:(

After that highly unfortunate incident with that "person from my past" my folks announced that a family friend had died and we were going to attend the wake and funeral. As he was the minister of a church, well, there were hordes of people at the wake. Unfortunately they were all the people that I grew up with :(

It was also unfortunate that we went to the wake on Christmas day :( I had never seen so many people that I had wanted to avoid.

The minister was a good person and I remember him best as an excellent counsellor. I think he had a good understanding of human nature... (something unfortunately that I did not develop in my younger years... and that resulted in me making the acquaintance of people that I today REALLY want to avoid) he certainly could see the issues in the people that I knew... (something that I failed to see for many years)....

However, it seemed (for me at least), this event was like Fate or Karma or something asking me in abstract terms if I wanted to turn back now and return to where I once was... in fact I had people asking me to come back :P 

Honestly... I hadn't thought a lot about why I left it all behind... When I did leave that life so many years ago, I had done so because I felt terribly unhappy about being where I was. Reflecting on my decision, I realised that being with that particular community did not make me happy because my faith as it was back then was based on fear and not on a belief that this was what I had decided to stand for....

The problem with the community I had come from was that for the most part, it attracted people who talked more about hellfire and brimstone than the love of God. In fact, my own father was of the opinion that Hell was an important concept that was not preached enough in some "modern" churches because he felt it helped to "save souls" :P

I should have listened to Mr Cow in the university I attended. Mr Cow was a lecturer who taught a minor module in my course of study... He was a very very strong minded chap who had his own unique views and did not take any crap from anyone... not even the authorities... He was also a man of uniquely strong faith and I believe his grasp of theology was also pretty sound...

One, he had proposed to myself and some students of similar faith the following notion...

Were we believers because of fear... in particular the fear of burning in hell.... or did we choose this path because it was something that we felt was worth standing for?

He was of the notion that it was a poor poor basis for faith... if the reason it existed was because of fear.

Unfortunately, I had not really understood his reasoning back then because I was too deep into the whole thing... I think I even felt a little bit... surprised that he had even raised that question...

I think I asked him if he wasn't afraid of Hell at all... i think he said that... if his faith was based on fear alone... he'd rather be in the fire .....


If I had understood him earlier... I could have avoided all those mistakes.. years of it... 

The problem about having a faith that is based on fear is that... you are always wondering if you have "made it"... so to speak... Honestly, the standard of holiness that was advocated by the community that I was in is... in today's world... unrealistic... Moreover, as the community was fringe and not mainstream... they held to the belief that the religion as practiced by themselves was of far superior quality than in other groups of similar belief.... 

To most other people... the community I was in would be considered extreme or purist... :P

Naturally, being human and Singaporean... I found it terribly difficult to uphold the standard of holiness that was advocated... (there was one time I remembered a view advocated by some members of the community that - going to the movies was undesirable because most movies weren't exactly moral and the environment of the movie theatre was one that led to people, especially young people engaging in immoral acts... thus, some members did not go to any cinemas at all... since movie-going is a national pastime for Singaporeans... you can see how that presents a huge problem) ....that led to constant failure... and constant doubt regarding my own faith... half of my childhood was spent learning religious doctrine from members of the community and my own father... and because of all these views... I was never ever secure in my own faith... 


Kids aren't dumb... and certainly I understood what I read and studied... unlike many of my peers, I never had a problem with Shakespearean english especially when I started learning it in secondary school because the scriptures I read was in the same type of language... (some members of the community felt for the longest time that the only accurate translation of the scripture was the king james version, and rejected all other modern translations)...


Well... I was a thinking kid and really..... knowing all of THAT... never helped me feel like I had actually managed to attain the whole "salvation" thing...


So what happened was that I ended up wallowing in fear, guilt and doubt for years... and when a person becomes afraid and guilty, they also become extremely zealous... I can honestly say that I probably spent more hours "serving God" than my very faithful father....:( 


Seeing all those people made me remember my own childhood... 

I never want to go back to all of that... it was a terrible terrible burden being in that community... I could never ever really be myself in all of that... in fact, I had to invent this person who never really existed.... just so I could have something to show people on a Sunday....:P 

Now, I don't have anything against the religion in general and I think some of the best people I know are in it... but.... it is certainly not my cup of tea... and certainly not with the community I grew up with.... 

I shared my experiences with F who felt after listening to all of it, that.. well... my community was considered a very non-mainstream sect in christendom... 

F was once an ordained minister... it is pretty ironic that she's the one I talk to the most now about spirituality and stuff...


I think I have a huge hangup over this entire "faith" thing... in fact, F noticed that people who were once monks or nuns in their past lives or who are now in a religious order generally DO NOT like me at all... it's like they can sniff out my hangup without even me opening my mouth... 

well... but that's really something for another time...:P

A Post Before Christmas,,,,

Once, many years ago, this festive season used to be the busiest time of the year for me... but not because of work... I used to have a lot of religious commitments... which is really really odd, because my family doesn't celebrate this holiday at all. They just go through the motions of celebration when invited to other peoples' homes for the sake of politeness (for some people)... or fun (for the rest of us...)

The thing about a having a father that reads a lot about his area of interest is that well, he found out long ago that decorating Christmas trees probably had its roots in ancient druidic practices... (I've wanted a tree since I was a kid but thanks to my father, they are out because he felt it was a heathen practice... ) Also, he felt that Christmas was a christianised version of the traditional pagan holiday of Yule and other similar year-end winter holidays celebrated by ancient non-Christian Europeans, so we have no celebrations at home except for a big dinner IF he and my mother feel like it... In fact, I remember working on Christmas day when I was a teenager trying to scrape together enough cash for stuff in the new year... because there was nothing else to do on that day...

Being a "by the book" kind of believer, my father felt that the only festival worth remembering on the Christian calender was Easter... It commemorating the death and resurrection of his Lord... since, as he said... it was the only thing that was commanded for believers to remember... and he does have a ton of theological knowledge to back his view.

You know, we don't ever have easter eggs or chocolates or bunnies at our house either... :P I wonder why since my father never made the whole Easter - Ostara connection.

I guess its because my folks aren't too much into having "fun". Or maybe its just too much effort to get stuff ready..... I dunno.... I see some gift chocolates on the table now, but I think its just in anticipation of returning someone's gift since it is likely someone will give  my folks something on Christmas day when they go for service... :P And believe me, my folks don't like making social boo-boos.

Anyways... so what does this season mean to me now? Actually its still one of the busiest times of the year for me 'cos for some weird karmic reason, the universe or Source makes it such that I see a huge parade of all the people I've either had issues with or who have issues with me...

In the past week, I met a person from my past I really didn't like.... and fell really really sick afterwards... yeah , I've got the stupid f****** FLU again with the slimy green phelgm. Some people are just "toxic"... as echoed by a friend who works at Da Bear's... I heartily agree.. I think next time if that m***** f****** b**** is gonna turn up at a meeting of old friends, I'll just be very rude and say "I don't want to make it".

Honestly, I have never been insulted in the face as many times as on that Thursday night... by that B****. But in an effort to save the rest of the innocent bystanders and pretty decent folk...from discomfort over me flipping the dinner table and walking out, I had to ignore all of that... I have no idea why that b**** seems out to get me this year since I don't think I ever did anything nasty to her.... :P

F says I am slipping in my meditations and spiritual practice and that's why I met those people... don't say I disagree with her... its been a very very hectic end of the year.... no time to consider stuff which I should be thinking about... I've still got a painting dateline and that sure isn't helping 'cos all I wanna do is sleep :(

But despite all that I'm feeling now about these very short and not very fun holidays, I did learn quite a lot about myself and managed to overcome a longstanding fear. I used to be afraid of meeting or confronting that nasty b**** .. and I really don't know why, since she isn't really anyone powerful or important... unlike some of my other old school acquaintances in the government... but now, seeing her after so long, I find myself laughing at my own silliness... why should a very very bloated, spiteful, lonely person cause me so much consternation? 

Perhaps, as F would say, "it is something energetic she is putting out..."... maybe she is right since none of the other normal people seated at the table said anything in retort when she started throwing her arrogance around... I mean, I used to think I was arrogant and self-absorbed, but now I think I'm pretty normal by comparison.

In fact, I think that in comparison to all the people from my past that I have met these past few weeks... most of my friends now are "normal" by comparison....

Anyways, I anticipate that this Christmas I'll be meeting more people from my past that I do not want to meet. I hope I don't end up punching someone.... cos I really don't have any more patience for people who for some stupid karmic reason, have some kind of issue with me.

Flu again? And this time I'm not even sure..... in listless mood.....

Flu again... and this time, I'm not even sure it IS flu.

It started during the weekend after too many late nights. My nose started to hurt and then my throat. It went away for 1 day and I thought I was okay... but they... "lucky" me, it was back one morning when I woke up with a stuffed nose.... in only 1 nostril!

Unfortunately this 1 nostril has been dripping since Monday and my throat feels scratchy.... soooo I'm gonna treat it like it is the flu. :P Which really really sucks since I have a dateline these 2 weeks and a book I have ordered from Kinokuniya just arrived.... after 6 LOOOONNNNGGGG weeks.... oh well.... but its the same if I ordered it from Amazon...at least with Kino, you are assured of getting it without the book getting lost in the mail...

So yeah, I'm in no mood to read an academic text.... the pic of the cover is as seen below:

Wolfy and I found this one evening when we were surfing around.....  its related to the dream I had about 2 years ago about a medieval witch trial. Well, I'll get around to reading it.... soon. 

Reason for choice of book? Well, coincidentially one of the case studies in the book is of the trial I had dreamt about. After dreaming about this very perculiar case, I had done a bit of "connect-the-dots" and identified the actual incident. 

Naturally after figuring out which historical case the dream was about, I looked up the Catholic Encyclopedia online.... I mean, from all the detail I had found thus far, it seems that the thing I had dreamt about was a pretty famous case in its time. The odd thing about this is that the Catholic Encyclopedia - New Advent doesn't mention this case at all.. in fact, it doesn't mention any of the main people involved in this case. Despite the fact that some of the people involved in this trial were pretty famous individuals.

This is pretty strange considering the fact that they have pretty extensive writeups on other similar infamous figures like Konrad of Marlburg, a witchhunter and (according to secular historians) an individual who had sadistic tendencies who was most likely the main culprit in the death of a beloved female saint.


Wolfy said he smelled a giant rat (that is to say... giant cover-up)...I mean, why write a big article excusing the actions of one crazy zealot and say nothing at all about another... and apparently both are equally famous?

Da da da da.... conspiracy theory..... heh heh heh

Anyways, since it was an interesting mystery we did a bit of digging and found this book. After reading a preview of the book on Google books, I had decided to get it because it contains a blow by blow account of the trial in question AND does confirm some of the amazing details I had seen in my dream. Also, the author does a great job of referencing all the material she had referred to for the case studies in this book. So we know where all the information comes from... which is great, so we know that the author has not made all of it up.




Well.....





That was like 2 weeks ago, but I forgot to publish this post... My flu is now gone, thanks to Chinese medication and essential oils and being extremely lazy for a few days......